From Whence Cometh my Assurance?

What provides assurance of salvation? For too many years of my life I was terrified that I was not truly a Christian. Youth ministers and preachers would say things like, "If you don't know that date and time you were saved, you're not saved. You should have it written inside your Bible so you remember." I had no date. I had no time. I had no monumental experience upon which I could reflect. To this day I have no idea when I was actually saved. It had to have been between the ages of 8 and 16, but that is a pretty broad time span.
Eventually I found assurance in two things, the affirmation of my beliefs and the works that accompanied my faith. I affirmed the essential Christian doctrines. I tried vigorously to obey God. Today I am quite certain of my salvation. I have no fears that one day the Lord will tell me that he never knew me. My assurance has grown in the absence of an experience upon which I can reflect for comfort.
This brings me to the question I really want to ask: should we as ministers counsel people to reflect upon an experience for assurance of their salvation. It seems altogether possible that encouraging people to reflect upon such experiences could give assurance to the unsaved and doubt to the elect. An emotional experience is not the substance of salvation. Perhaps what is called for is the de-emphasis of the experience and the re-emphasis of faith and works. I think we should encourage those who need assurance to compare their beliefs with orthodox Christian beliefs. Next, I think we should encourage them to examine their own lives and see if there be any evidence of sanctification. This may sound subjective, but it is better than asking if has ever been emotionally moved enough to respond to an invitation, right?